You might be a herper if...

As the name suggests, this is where you have fun. Please keep it clean.

Postby psychomike » Tue Mar 11, 2008 3:41 pm


I'm gonna get fired for being on this site the whole day... BUT I LOVE IT!!!

What did the python say to the viper ?
I've got a crush on you !
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Postby froot » Tue Mar 11, 2008 3:50 pm

We salute the improvement of the human genome by honoring those who remove themselves from it.
Of necessity, this honor is generally bestowed posthumously. -
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Postby bradmiller » Fri Mar 14, 2008 2:55 pm

... when you are ordering pinkies, fuzzies and hoppers and people over hearing you think you are a drug addict!
You know, you can touch a stick of dynamite, but if you touch a venomous snake it’ll turn around and bite you and kill you so fast it’s not even funny.
- Steve Irwin - The Crocodile Hunter
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Postby Bushviper » Sat Mar 15, 2008 7:28 am

Bradmiller said "... when you are ordering pinkies, fuzzies and hoppers and people over hearing you think you are a drug addict!" but they can also think you are a pedophile and a pervert.
It is easier to ask for forgiveness than permission.

Those who are afraid to ask are ashamed of learning.
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Postby Hendre » Sun Mar 16, 2008 1:01 am

-- you find toung flicking attractive in the opposite sex

-- your neighbors thinks you are a drug lord because certain times a year strange people enter your house and everybody leaves with small boxes

-- the local power plant knows the exact time your timers go off.

-- You have a special drawer to keep perfect sheds in.

-- Your friends ask you when the last time you scored was & you reply "Man, it was great! This guy sold me an 8' female Colombian & the 125 L for dirt just in time for breeding season," and they look at you like "WHAT THE HELL are you talking about?!?!"

-- You're the customer at the pet store but answer all the herp questions.

-- You purchase contacts that look like snake eyes so you fit in with your little world at home.

-- You quit smoking not to better your health, but out of concern for the effect of second hand smoke on your herps.

-- Your arms say you're an I.V. drug user...your python says you're dinner!

-- you try to convince somebody thats living with you that this will be the last herp! PROMISE!

-- You feel guilty picking your "pet" rabbits in front of a group of bunny-adoring children.

-- The employees at the local pet store give you dirty looks every time they see you heading for the small animal section.

-- Your snakes are having a better sex life than you & you're happy about it!

-- You tell the salesperson at the pet store you won't be needing the seven-day health guarantee on the mouse you just bought.

-- People come to your house and ask "What is that smell?" and you reply "What smell?"

-- You can speak Latin well but have never taken a formal Latin course.

-- You can get to the center of the newspaper on the first try.

-- You sleep on the couch but have a lovely reptile setup in the bedroom.

-- You got in trouble with your girlfriend for looking at the "free kitten" ads with a gleam in your eye.

-- you tell people on the phone:" I cant talk now my balls are missing!"

-- You're standing in the pet store checkout line with your purchase in hand & the person behind you says "Oh, they're so cute! Do they make good pets?" and you reply, "These? Hmmm. Actually, I have no idea...I never thought about that..."

-- Someone tells you they have three balls and not only do you not think it's weird, you ask if you can see them!

-- Your wife banishes you to the couch after developing the family vacation photos & finding nothing but herp shots!

-- You own 50 animals and none have names

-- you consider anything with fur and a tail game for your boa

-- At your child's "pet day", they're the only ones returning home with their pet
A slithery slide on the wild side
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Postby Boadicea » Mon Mar 24, 2008 8:21 am

...The people at the local car wash quarrel over who is NOT going to wash your car since the last time they found that missing snake in it

...You think car washes are firstly a good way of locating the one that got away, secondly an easy and cheap way to get some good entertainment and thirdly, getting the car clean

....You have more sticking plasters on your fingers in a week than most people have in a year;

...You deliberately don't put skin lotion on in winter to cultivate that scaly look;

...Your idea of cute has nothing to do with soft and fluffy

...You are adept at doing the leopard crawl into the pet shop to avoid the guy that keeps asking you how your pet rats are doing that you bought from them several months ago

...Friends and family habitually check under the seats before getting into your car

...Your family complains about snakeskin in the plug hole of the sink

...You know at least three different ways to kill a mouse none of which involve mousetraps or poison

...You are concerned about intestinal parasites in the local wild rat population

....You have inadvertently created the local wild rat population

...You can spot a mouse on the floor at distances of 5 metres or more and catch it before it knows whats happening

...You have more flies and mosquitoes at your house than everyone else due to an extreme paranoia about insecticides

...Visitors tell you that you should charge people to visit your home

....You don't get burgled
"You and I wear the dangerous looseness of doom and find it becoming. Life, for eternal us, is now; and now is much too busy being a little more than everything to seem anything, catastrophic included"- e e cummings
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Postby Bernice » Tue Apr 15, 2008 1:31 pm

- People think you have a pillowcase fetish
- you take three times as long as anyone else to finish a hike
- no rock is safe on a hike trail
- you invariably start a hike with an empty backpack / camera and return with a full backpack / camera memory chip.
- you refer to the local pet store as the 'take away' joint.
- you can stitch minor wounds yourself
- you can climb trees better than any of your friends
- your first reaction to finding a baby snake in someones house is 'aaaw cute!'
Happiness is a fat mouse and a warm rock!

Dont fly! 4X4! The noble eagle may soar! but a weasel wont get sucked into a jet intake valve...

Some people are like a slinky spring, they make you smile when you push them down a flight of stairs!
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Postby Trayton » Tue Apr 15, 2008 9:53 pm

The kids at youth ask if there are any snakes,geckos or any other wierd creatures in your car before they get in.
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Postby Serpy » Tue Apr 15, 2008 9:56 pm look at your old 3 iron and say "hmmm it'll make a good hook stick"
A good burper is a good herper.
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Postby damiensharjah » Wed Apr 16, 2008 11:15 am

You go on impulsive shopping sprees at plumbing supply stores and are the only person in the shop exercising lateral thought when staring at a piece of drainpipe.
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Postby Westley Price » Wed Apr 16, 2008 11:17 am

your friends refuse to have dinner at your place because "dude, there's mice in your deep freeze!"
"I am dying by inches from not having anybody to talk to about insects." - Charles Darwin
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Postby damiensharjah » Wed Apr 16, 2008 11:20 am

When doing the dishes and lifting plates from a stack, you lift them with the open side away from you instinctively.

If you have a family, you generally have two freezers.
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Postby drummer » Wed Apr 16, 2008 11:26 am

You forget about that mouse thawing out in the warm water in the bathroom basin when people rock up...
what the hell is wrong with me?
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Postby Buck Rogers » Wed Apr 16, 2008 11:27 am

- is book marked on your web browser

- sareptiles is a better networking tool than facebook

- all your tupperwares have airholes

- you have excessive amounts of pot plant bases used for water dishes and pot plant used as hides but cant keep a normal house plant alive for more than a week
Life is a beautiful struggle
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Postby Buck Rogers » Wed Apr 16, 2008 11:29 am

you have to hide the pinkies in the freezer from your girlfriend (I really have to do this its sad)
Life is a beautiful struggle
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